# Pretentious Bulls***



## DavidBondy (Aug 17, 2010)

I had an email from Maxwell Colonna-Dashwood's company about the forthcoming launch of their capsule range. No problem to read the announcement until I came across this:

"We think these tasters are a great introduction to the curatorial experience Colonna offers."

What on earth is a 'curatorial experience?' What a load of pretentious bollocks! I was going to order a box for a family member who is still only on Nespresso capsules but I am not at all sure that I am yet ready for a 'curatorial experience!'

He's only selling coffee for goodness sake!

David


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## 4085 (Nov 23, 2012)

ah, a fellow member of the coffee bollocks society I think. So much guff is talked about coffee. Very hard to rubbish a lot of it, but is it possible to measure the actual difference their thoughts make. I have a bull shit bin, ooppss, there goes another one into it


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## The Systemic Kid (Nov 23, 2012)

When 3rd wave falls over the cliff of hyperbole.


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## DavecUK (Aug 6, 2013)

DavidBondy said:



> I had an email from Maxwell Colonna-Dashwood's company about the forthcoming launch of their capsule range. No problem to read the announcement until I came across this:
> 
> "We think these tasters are a great introduction to the curatorial experience Colonna offers."
> 
> ...


Shhhh....are you allowed to puncture the balloon of pretentiousness of the MCD clan. Also if you did, it would mean complete destruction in a 3 mile radius with buildings flattened and trees uprooted up to 10 miles away.

When I hear mention of MCD...I think this is expected


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## DavidBondy (Aug 17, 2010)

So .. would you like sugar in your curatorial experience?


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## Mrboots2u (May 10, 2013)

The Systemic Kid said:


> When 3rd wave falls over the cliff of hyperbole.


Eh?


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## dsc (Jun 7, 2013)

If you google "curatorial experience" you get a bunch of links to curator related jobs and art gallery websites...

Reminds me of all the bullsh*t you read on BMW websites when choosing optional equipment.

Right, off to grab me a cup of curatorial experience and do some work...

T.


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## Mrboots2u (May 10, 2013)

It's flat cap city here today ain't it


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## Step21 (Oct 2, 2014)

Maybe they have inherited a collection of ancient coffees which they are roasting up and packaging for connoisseurs of stale coffee


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## MWJB (Feb 28, 2012)

The hyperbole doesn't seem out of place with Nespresso's own blurb, if you're going after than market, play the same game.

As with anything in life, if you don't think your product or service is special, why would anyone else?


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## The Systemic Kid (Nov 23, 2012)

'if Carling did coffee capsules, they'd probably be the most curatorial in the world'.

Doesn't quite work, does it?


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## dsc (Jun 7, 2013)

Quite possibly this is due to not being a native speaker, but isn't curatorial used rather incorrectly here? If you check the definition of the word, it seems like it's simply an adjective based on the word curator which is rather tightly tied to museum / art environments.

T.


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## 7493 (May 29, 2014)

Unfortunately "curate, curated and curatorial" have been appropriated to mean, "I'm an opinionated clever clogs and this is my list of coffees, cheese, hi-fi, music, films etc. which are the best!" It's annoying tosh!!!


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## Grahamg (Oct 24, 2013)

He's in Bath, that explains it all - large population of posh twats with their heads firmly inserted in their own arses.


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## The Systemic Kid (Nov 23, 2012)

Grahamg said:


> He's in Bath, that explains it all - large population of posh twats with their heads firmly inserted in their own arses.


Probably what the locals thought when the Romans arrived.


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## 4085 (Nov 23, 2012)

look, at the end of the day, it is a flipping nespresso capsule of stale coffee. It does not matter how nice it was when made. Just because it is endorsed or made by one of those on the high alter of the english coffee scene does not give it any more credence in my eyes


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## DavecUK (Aug 6, 2013)

dfk41 said:


> look, at the end of the day, it is a flipping nespresso capsule of stale coffee. It does not matter how nice it was when made. Just because it is endorsed or made by one of those on the high alter of the english coffee scene does not give it any more credence in my eyes


You heretic Dave, this is an MCD capsule we're talking about.... "a great introduction to the curatorial experience".

Quite obviously, you like me and others, don't know what we're talking about.


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## 4085 (Nov 23, 2012)

DavecUK said:


> You heretic Dave, this is an MCD capsule we're talking about.... "a great introduction to the curatorial experience".
> 
> Quite obviously, you like me and others, don't know what we're talking about.


I am so pleased you have confirmed my thoughts on heresy......I have long suspected I was......in a way it is a relief, but not as much relief as it is to know I talk pure rubbish.....I feel enlightened!


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## Jon (Dec 3, 2010)

dfk41 said:


> look, at the end of the day, it is a flipping nespresso capsule of stale coffee. It does not matter how nice it was when made. Just because it is endorsed or made by one of those on the high alter of the english coffee scene does not give it any more credence in my eyes


Have you tasted it?


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## 4085 (Nov 23, 2012)

It is a stale coffee capsule. Have not tried it and hope I nevr do!


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## Jon (Dec 3, 2010)

dfk41 said:


> It is a stale coffee capsule. Have not tried it and hope I nevr do!


Oh go on. Give it a go.

Just think what you used to think about Sage machines, flat burr grinders, Mythos grinders, etc.


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## Obnic (Jan 14, 2014)

The word has been appropriated by the Apple / Spotify generation. Many lack the attention span to listen to a whole album so they make what we used to call 'mix tapes' but which they call 'curated playlists' suggesting some artistic sensitivity which is no more apparent to me than the alleged talent of Turner Prize winners.


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## DavecUK (Aug 6, 2013)

Obnic said:


> The word has been appropriated by the Apple / Spotify generation. Many lack the attention span to listen to a whole album so they make what we used to call 'mix tapes' but which they call 'curated playlists' suggesting some artistic sensitivity which is no more apparent to me than the alleged talent of Turner Prize winners.


How can you say that, when the artistic talent is so clear









Oops sorry got the wrong one, the image below won the turner prize, the above photo was showing accessories from the Chandler building website, but it's an easy mistake to make.


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## hotmetal (Oct 31, 2013)

Hahaha DavecUK that's almost a spot the difference competition. When the Hotmetalette looks at the state of the bedroom sometimes, she says "have you had Tracey Emin in here while I was away".

Ok she doesn't, I made that up.

There's art and there's art. There's MCD coffee and McD coffee. Thing is, can you tell the difference?


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## DavidBondy (Aug 17, 2010)

My sample box of "curatorial experiences" arrived today. I suppose it is just an example of Colonna Irrigation ... I shall report on the coffee (sorry experience) once I have tried them ....

David


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## aaronb (Nov 16, 2012)

DavidBondy said:


> My sample box of "curatorial experiences" arrived today. I suppose it is just an example of Colonna Irrigation ... I shall report on the coffee (sorry experience) once I have tried them ....
> 
> David


If you have already set yourself up to be disappointed (which it sounds like), why even bother trying them?


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## Mrboots2u (May 10, 2013)

DavidBondy said:


> My sample box of "curatorial experiences" arrived today. I suppose it is just an example of Colonna Irrigation ... I shall report on the coffee (sorry experience) once I have tried them ....
> 
> David


I dont get they you ordered these , to me they are so far away from your preference of roast and coffee varietal . If it's purely to diss something you have decided you already don't like or do not have a preference for then I don't see what the point is .


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## DavidBondy (Aug 17, 2010)

No Martin. I am not the only coffee drinker here. I have a Nespresso Prodigio pod machine which is used by those that don't / won't / can't use my M3 / GS/3 combination.

I bought a starter pack of 80 Nespresso capsules when I bought the machine but they are now running out. I wanted to find a decent quality pod for them to use. That is why I put my name onto the Colonna list to be informed when their new pods were available. I was going to order them anyway but didn't like the bulls*** in the advertising material!

David


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## MWJB (Feb 28, 2012)

DavidBondy said:


> I was going to order them anyway but didn't like the bulls*** in the advertising material!
> 
> David


But the experience of Nespresso's "Grand Cru" coffees seems a no nonsense, grounded, description? I'm not knocking either, but if you are already a Nespresso customer you have already experienced creative descriptions...or bulls***, if you prefer.

Curatorial just seems to mean a cared for collection, not a claim to make you irresistible to the opposite sex, rich in a week, or leap high mountains with a single bound. I find it hard to see what you're being bull****ed about?


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## Drewster (Dec 1, 2013)

DavidBondy said:


> My sample box of "curatorial experiences" arrived today. I suppose it is just an example of Colonna Irrigation ... I shall report on the coffee (*sorry experience*) once I have tried them ....
> 
> David





aaronb said:


> If you have already set yourself up to be disappointed (which it sounds like), why even bother trying them?





Mrboots2u said:


> I dont get they you ordered these , to me they are so far away from your preference of roast and coffee varietal . If it's purely to diss something you have decided you already don't like or do not have a preference for then I don't see what the point is .





MWJB said:


> But the experience of Nespresso's "Grand Cru" coffees seems a no nonsense, grounded, description? I'm not knocking either, but if you are already a Nespresso customer you have already experienced creative descriptions...or bulls***, if you prefer.
> 
> Curatorial just seems to mean a cared for collection, not a claim to make you irresistible to the opposite sex, rich in a week, or leap high mountains with a single bound. I find it hard to see what you're being bull****ed about?


I think @DavidBondy was using "*sorry experience*" as a wry reference to the marketing rather than actually disparaging them before having tried....

I think 'sorry "*experience*"' might have conveyed his humour better.


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## DavidBondy (Aug 17, 2010)

What I should have said was 'Sorry! "Experience"' but for goodness sake! I was only commenting on the marketing bullshine! No need to have a cow about it!

David


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## 4085 (Nov 23, 2012)

Come on bond baby.....whats the verdict? Do I need to rush out and buy a Nespresso to experience this, or is it just as the title suggests?


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## Jumbo Ratty (Jan 12, 2015)

dfk41 said:


> Come on bond baby.....whats the verdict?


you can talk.

you never did tell us what the civet coffee was like in the end of the thread you started about it and id still like to know


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## aaronb (Nov 16, 2012)

dfk41 said:


> Come on bond baby.....whats the verdict? Do I need to rush out and buy a Nespresso to experience this, or is it just as the title suggests?


There is a review on the other colonna capsules thread.


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## DavidBondy (Aug 17, 2010)

dfk41 said:


> Come on bond baby.....whats the verdict? Do I need to rush out and buy a Nespresso to experience this, or is it just as the title suggests?


Well, I have tried two of the pods so far and I can safely say that I do not think that they are any better, or any worse, than any other pods that I have tried - including Nespresso's own brand and others. That said, I am not a great lover of any pod coffee and I have been singularly unsuccessful in using the fill-your-own kits.

I think I shall go back to bulk buying the Nespresso ones and let the pod drinkers here use those. At least they are not drinking instant!

David


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## 4085 (Nov 23, 2012)

Jumbo Ratty said:


> you can talk.
> 
> you never did tell us what the civet coffee was like in the end of the thread you started about it and id still like to know


I never actually opened it......it is vacuum packed and I think lying around somewhere unless I threw it out. Tell you what, if I find it I will definitely brew it


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## DavecUK (Aug 6, 2013)

DavidBondy said:


> Well, I have tried two of the pods so far and I can safely say that I do not think that they are any better, or any worse, than any other pods that I have tried - including Nespresso's own brand and others. That said, I am not a great lover of any pod coffee and I have been singularly unsuccessful in using the fill-your-own kits.
> 
> I think I shall go back to bulk buying the Nespresso ones and let the pod drinkers here use those. At least they are not drinking instant!
> 
> David


This seems a different opinion to the Capsules thread, but I'm not surprised that you found it the same as any other capsule.....it's sort of what I expected really from such a small amount of coffee for water volume.


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## MWJB (Feb 28, 2012)

DavecUK said:


> This seems a different opinion to the Capsules thread, but I'm not surprised that you found it the same as any other capsule.....it's sort of what I expected really from such a small amount of coffee for water volume.


What you are describing is brew ratio, which you can change. People enjoy coffee from 1:2 to 1:20.


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