# 'Twas The Night Before Christmas!



## MildredM (Feb 13, 2017)

'Twas the night before Christmas

And the beans have all run out,

The coffee machine's not working

It needs a good bash and a clout!

The grinder's full of gravel

And the milk has all gone off,

The bar towel is full of holes

And I've really had enough.

I dropped the flipping tamper

It landed on my toe,

The jug has sprung a leak or two

It's time for it to go.

I opened those Lavazza beans

The bag top ripped right off,

The beans are scattered everywhere

And they are fit only for t'trough.

As for Norvin's funnel thing

I don't need it these days,

There's three more like it on the shelf.

From when they were all the craze!

The Monolith needs cleaning

It's all packed and ready to send

To Kafatek by Parcel-Drop Post -

Bound to meet a sticky end.

But what's this in my inbox?

Forum Members' missives from on high?

Hold on! Help is on it's way

Whizzing through the sky!

The Forum crew will rally round

They'll really save the day.

It'll be the bestest Christmas ever

Who needs Santa and his sleigh?

The Foundry chaps have all chipped in

With bags of fresh roast beans

Camboshef has offered his grinder

And sundry top hole machines.

Joey and Jumbo Ratty

Have come up with the goods,

Snakehips will deliver

The mince pies and the puds.

Coffeechap's sending us his Torr,

Stanic a cloth of watered silk,

DFK47 the sweetest sugar,

Joey24 the freshest milk.

Grumpydaddy has filled a huge great hamper

Overflowing past the top

With biscotti, chocs and lovely stuff -

MrBoots will bring the pop.

It will be one big Forum party

One to savour in years to come.

And if you don't like this poem

Stick it up your festive . . .










Happy, happy Christmas everyone


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## Glenn (Jun 14, 2008)

You really are the best @MildredM


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## salty (Mar 7, 2017)

Glenn said:


> You really are the best @MildredM


I second that  Happy Christmas


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## joey24dirt (Jan 28, 2017)

Aww that's amazing. So very creative 

Merry Christmas from us four up here


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## jimbojohn55 (Jan 15, 2016)

That's fantastic - a great job - well done


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## Jollybean (May 19, 2013)

Merry Christmas Mildred. Thanks for all the fun and entertainment (and bar towels) you have provided this year.

....and Merry Christmas to all


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## Rhys (Dec 21, 2014)

Excellent!! Now where do I get a Mildred towel?


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## AndyDClements (Aug 29, 2016)

Have a great Christmas, Mildred you deserve it. I just had to cross-post the days of Christmas, to a car forum I frequent, at least now they know what aligns to my sense of humor (even if they now think I need a constant carer).


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## MildredM (Feb 13, 2017)

Thanks everyone









Let me know what you want on your BT @Rhys (Scrabble tiles are all the fashion at the minute).

Glad your car cohorts enjoyed a glimpse of your other life, @AndyDClements! I'm not sure if your car is among the embroidery designs on here . . . Let me know though if you'd like a BT too


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## coffeechap (Apr 5, 2012)

Didn't I win one? Remember diatribe!


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## John Yossarian (Feb 2, 2016)

Merry Christmas Everyone! Thank you Mildred for posting such a nice and so optimistic poetry







. It really made my night/day









Cheers!


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## AndyDClements (Aug 29, 2016)

MildredM said:


> ... I'm not sure if your car is among the embroidery designs on here . . . Let me know though if you'd like a BT too


Thanks for the offer, sadly not there but thanks for the offer.


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